Click here to watch “Getting Married Youngish”.
Click here to watch “Getting Married Youngish”.
I think most guys have heard that girls plan their wedding day from as far back as they have enough cognitive reasoning to think. I’m not one of those girls. So many times I’ve been tempted to let my mind imagine and delve into all the wonderful possibilities. But I stop myself because I know that a wedding is just one day. And that the marriage that comes from it is far more important.
However, there are some things I need in order to have my dream wedding, hopefully my demands aren’t crazy.
1. God fearing man
I find it so funny how some girls will go on for hours about the location, colors and ambiance of their wedding and forget to marry someone good! I remember telling one of my friends that I just wanted to marry someone completely in love with God. She looked at me kinda weird and said that I should be careful of those guys, they may be a little crazy. But the way I see it, God is the center of my life. He is my moral compass and my everything. So why not marry someone who loves God as I do?
I’ve always loved the colors red and white because it looks so classy and simple. I wish I could have a small wedding but I have way to many relatives to ever wish to do that. But I can keep things simple.
3. Lace wedding dress
I don’t know what is about lace. It just looks so refined and so classy. I would of course need a sari too, but maybe a lace dress for the actual wedding itself would be nice. And white looks really nice against my burnt chocolate complexion.
4. People I love
I want to be around people who actually care about me and my well being. People who smile and pictures and are actually really happy. People I’m happy to spend my day with. I promised my aunt I’d get married in India if she couldn’t come to America. I want her there.
I want to start off my married life draped in blessings! Is that a little selfish?
I miss the way being in India makes me feel. It’s always hot and I struggle not to sweat. I’m not quite sure why I do that, sweating is natural but I try to find the coldest room in my house and just lie down. Sometimes when I’m in India I try to avoid India. Everything tastes different in India.
The ice cream has this weird consistency. I remember going to Carvel in Bangalore and eating ice cream that actually tasted like ice cream and feeling so excited. My cousins were bewildered by the taste. The “American” food is spicy and the Indian food is always fresher.
What I find so funny is that the morning the picture above was taken I was bitterly crying. I was a sophomore in high school who was visiting India for only 2 weeks during my spring break. AP Exams were coming fast so I was going through all of India and still doing homework from time to time. My papers for studying had fallen from the truck of my car into a ditch and were almost ruined. I was bitterly crying because my homework meant so much to me. It was so stupid now that I look back at it.
We were staying with my great-uncle. He was one of those people who seemed really hard and unapproachable but loving and like a teddy bear all at the same time. He saw how upset I was and ironed out all my papers so that they were dry and almost as good as new.
That was the last memory I have of him, and can have of him. Because he died before I could visit him again. I think he’s what I’ll miss most. If my mom gave him “american” money he always thought it was a big deal and kept it on display. He loved us, he really did. And I still don’t feel like he’s really gone. Because dying doesn’t really mean someone isn’t there for you anymore. They live on and on as long as you care enough to remember them.
I miss India because as angry as I felt at times, my aunt could always find a way to make me look at a situation in a completely different light. I remember watching a podcast and hearing how a man was asked if he regretted studying physics in college now that he was doing business. He said no because math has a way of teaching him to look at a problem and look at it from a completely new way and find a way to solve it.
That’s what my aunt did for me. She would look at me and suddenly I felt so stupid for becoming angry at something small, she killed me with her kindness! I was only 16 when I visited India but I remember telling my aunt that when I got married, if she couldn’t come to America I would get married there. And I remember seeing her almost cry from joy. She was happy that I still remembered her, how could I not?
I’ll always miss my family in India when I’m not with them, and my family and friends in America when I’m not them. It reminds me of my grandma who always tells me that when she’s taking care of my cousins in India she misses me and my brother so much. And when she’s with us, she misses my cousins so much. All she really wants is for all of us to be with her together.