I don’t think a lot of people notice this about me, but I’m a very competitive person. I’ve always been a competitive person. From as far back as I can remember, I have competed for something. I remember being maybe 9 or 10 years old sitting with my brother and eating some oreos when suddenly a competition of “Who could eat the most oreos?!” was created. The prize was a horrible stomach ache.
Fast forward to high school and I join DECA. What is DECA? Well DECA was my life but more specifically it was a organization of business students with regional, state-wide, and national competitions. I loved it. I was one of those really annoying people who really took it way to seriously. I loved pin trading (Every state had a pin and at nationals you could trade pins with different states), I loved the adrenaline rush of presenting. I loved winning. I wasn’t too keen on losing though, but you need to lose some in order to win some. In fact you need to lose a lot to win even a little.
With that being said, I have always hated the fact that I’m competitive. And I’ve tried my best to not be the type of competitive person who steps on people to reach the top. Do you know who these people are? I think we ALL know who those people are. I remember going into one DECA competition introducing myself to one of my competitors and having her greet me by saying, “Hi, I’m going to beat you!”. Yeah, I actually wish I was joking.
I know people who send people the wrong words to memorize or conveniently have someone miss their presentation time. I’ve seen them and find them repulsive. More so because if I didn’t I think I would be one of those people.
But now back to the title of this blog, which is probably why you started reading this post. InterVarsity is the christian fellowship on my campus (also an international organization…I think) and from what I’ve found, it’s done none of these things. I go to a business school and even though I’m not at the point where there is even a need to be competitive, I know there are people I can’t trust. I know that there are people who are really just looking for their best interest. Can I blame them? Not really.
I know these people and they are not few and far between. In fact sometimes I feel like they engulf the school. And being a competitive person, I’ve grown tired of being competitive and now just want to do my best.
The thing about InterVarsity that feels so odd is that fact that in the midst of all this I know so many selfless people. I know people who barley even knew me but took the time out to mentor me and guide me. I know people who took the time to see what I wanted and how I was feeling. I know people who actually cared about me as a person. Because at the end of the day with InterVarsity, it’s different. We’re not subject to beating someone out for a test grade to feel self validated. We serve a God who teaches us that love, peace, joy and kindness and the values we must emulate.
So this confuses me because most people I know are selfish. Again, how can they not be? But there is so much more to be gained in giving than receiving. And maybe InterVarsity will always confuse me, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.