Everyone feels sad sometimes

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It feels odd to write down, but it’s so true.  Everyone feels sad sometimes.  I don’t know why I imagine that I am the only person who feels the way I do when I go through rough patches in life.  Sometimes that sadness can seem engulfing and the scariest thing in the world to do is to address what I’m feeling.  The bible says that there is a time for weeping and a time for rejoicing.  But all I want to do is rejoice!

I’m sure that there are lots of people who feel the same way that I do.  I don’t want whatever situation I’m going through to burden others.  I don’t want other people to know that I’m experiencing pain.  And I imagine that everyone really is exactly the way they appear to be on the surface.  But nothing could be farther from the truth.

Absolutely everyone we meet in life is facing his or her own battle.  And this is all the more reason to love and to love like never before.

My mother was the first person to make me realize this.  She told me to be kindest to the people who seemed the meanest.  Because when you stopped and took time to get to know them, it’s like peeling an onion!  There are layers and layers underneath and everyone has a reason for being the way that they are.

In particular she told me there was a woman who she saw daily who seemed to hate her.  It’s so hard to love those who hate us.  The bible can vouch for this fact.  But she told me that when she learned of the pain this woman experienced in her life, she suddenly understood the bitterness.  She understood it instantly.  And her love for this woman was not in vain, now they’re actually really great friends!

The perfect biblical model for this kind of compassion is embodied in the life of Jesus.  He looked at the defects and the outcasts of the world and somehow he chose to love them.  I guess he saw us in a way that we cannot even see ourselves.  It’s funny because sometimes it’s not even people who are putting these labels and ideas on us.  We do it to ourselves.

If there is anyone like me, who is reading this, please know that you’re not alone.  Sometimes I feel so sad tears feel like tiny needles shooting from my eyeballs.  Or so angry that my veins will burst!  Or even so happy and loved that I imagine my happiness is contagious.  We are not our emotions or our temporary feelings.  Feelings change.  And we are never ever really alone, never at all.

Day 20: Nicknames

Here are a few of the nicknames I have been given over the years!

Neener

This was first given to me by my cousin Eden and I was kind of offended by it at first.  Over the years I have grown to love this name though, I even find it a little bit charming too!  It just sounds really weird and odd and I love being weird and odd.

Niku

Only my cousins in India call me this.  I get surprised when I see them after a long time and they call me this because it makes me feel odd.  My body instinctively responds to it but my mind may not have consciously recognize it.  I actually like this name a lot!  I think it’s cute!

Nina Cootie

This was given to me by my dad.  It’s my house name and strangely longer than my actually name.  It’s kind of embarrassing!  But I feel like only people who really love me call me this.

Nine-ah

Only a few people call me this and mostly to just annoy me.  I’ve always thought my actual name is easy to pronounce.

Snap

I was Snap, Christine was Crackle and Sherin was Pop.  It was actually supposed to be that Sherin was Crackle and Christine was Pop but I feel like Christine can sometimes come off more as a crackle and Sherin more like a Pop.  All three of us girls have gone through sunday school together for our entire lives and these were the name we betrothed upon us.  I also call Christine Giggles and Sherin Cuddles, I need a cute nickname like that!  Maybe… talkles? nah

Fire

I’m the Fire and Christine is the Ice.  We’re total opposites but I think that’s why our friendship has worked so well thus far.  When the fire get out of control, bring in some ice.   But something you need some warmth too!